128. Me

On my way home from work today I began to think about things that I liked.

I like my job.
I like the fact that I'm losing weight.
I like the people I work with.
I like the way my hair looks, even when it's messy, [YAY TMAI! haha]
I like the way my room looks and feels.
I like to wake up early.
And so on and so forth.
Then I just thought to myself, 'you know what? I like me.'
I feel empowered and I feel gratified. No, not everything in my life is going perfectly. I'm not glam, skinny, rich and getting my way. That would be perfection. In fact, nothing in my life is going perfectly, really. I have a decent job that pays decently where I'm lucky if I get any fifteen minute breaks where I have to stand outside in the freezing cold for hours at a time and clean up after people constantly. I have no money, really. I don't have a car. I don't have steady credit. I have debt. I can't figure out what I want to do when I grow up, but something is telling me I need to do something science-y, which is going to be hecka hard for me since in high school I decided that I was never going to do anything concerning science so I barely paid any attention through what science I did take and I didn't take chemistry. My parents get on my nerves too much and I know I'm becoming like my parents. I have a temper because I am over protective of my friends and I'm not sorry to be over protective so I'm not sorry I have a temper concerning that. I'm stubborn and ridiculous. But, I wouldn't have it any other way. I like me.


After working at Lowe's for some time now, I realize what I have been missing in my life: BOYS. And no, not in the "I wanna date all men" kind of way either. I haven't really hung out with a guy friend in a while. Tom and I used to chill sometimes, but it was weird. It wasn't laid back as much. Marco and I would hang out, but just sometimes. I still love those two like crazy, don't get me wrong, but the last guy friends I would hang out with, with no inhibitions, was Stangina and Scuba. [Not their real names, don't fret.] Well, working at Lowe's has made non inhibition hanging out with guy time. Becca will tell you about some of the guys because some of them are just so gosh darn cute and funny, I need to talk about them to SOMEONE. So, I do. But honestly, I could never see myself with any of these guys. And that is what I like. Nothing is expected. But that doesn't stop us from flirting mercilessly. And I like that. Ryan and I get along really well. He is on a fire department in Maine, is gawky, awkward and strange. He throws sodas at me and expects me to catch them. To his surprise, I did. Haha. Devin always makes sure that I don't need a loader and always steps up to help customers load their huge purchases so that I don't have to call someone to page someone on the walkie. He always will talk to me and calls me "hun" or "sweetie." Then there is Kollin. When I first met him, it was after being at work for 7 hours so I was feeling very punchy. He asked me a question and I replied something DRIPPING in sarcasm. It was probably something about my name which is always a conversation starter, oddly enough. So, now we have conversations in sarcasm. It's great. Anthony, aweee, he's so cute. :D he is one of our designated 'loaders' and awee, I wish I could describe him better than this. He is wicked laid back and reserved but always willing to help or crack a joke with me. He never seems to have a negative comment and takes criticism well. He is just a wicked sweetie. Ohhhh, guyyyyys. :D


OhAndIJustSpent50DollarsAtAmericanEagleAndThatMakesMeLoveMyLifeEvenMore.
HOOOOODIEEEEEEEES.
Becca, kill me.