Love. <3

Love. <3

My love is like my music.
When I know I like a song, I can't get enough of it.
I sing it all the time, whenever inspired, or whenever I can't get it out of my head.
Some songs fade away.
Some songs I forget.
Some songs stay with me, engraved in my heart and soul forever.
Sometimes, when you think you find a song that suits you perfectly,
you find out you are so so terribly wrong.
There is one song that is a part of every fiber of your existence.
You can't get it out of your soul, your heart, your being.
Your one song.





Love. <3

Being on stage, you aren't you.
You can't be embarrassed;
that isn't you.
You are another person.
You don't speak, your character does.
You get to be someone else for a couple of hours.
Leave yourself behind and get wrapped up in someone else's problems.
You get to play faux emotions.
Emotions you've never experienced first hand are played out.
You experience fake life on a stage,
because you aren't you anymore.
<3

Before you, my life was like a moonless night. Very dark, but there were stars--points of light and reason...And then you shot across my sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty. When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over the horizon, everything went black. Nothing had changed, but my eyes were blinded by the light. I couldn't see the stars anymore. And there was no more reason for anything.
[Twilight]





And everything is as it should be.

Change.

YouStutterOften (12:26:20 PM):	I wanna get into an ucky subject between us. Cause I always say to say what you get annoyed about. And when I complain about megan you tell me to tell her why I'm upset.. Well, in my head I've been complaining about you, so I wanna talk to you, lol. And I'm sorry if it makes you feel bad. =/
Cat Catharsis (12:26:39 PM):	naw. I'd rather you be honest with me.
YouStutterOften (12:26:50 PM):	Kks.
YouStutterOften (12:27:01 PM):	Well, it's basically about the physical stuff between you and mike.
Cat Catharsis (12:27:08 PM):	yes. I knew this was coming.
YouStutterOften (12:27:14 PM):	lol, i thought so.
Cat Catharsis (12:27:17 PM):	lol
YouStutterOften (12:28:23 PM):	Well, I was thinking about it, and I remembered something that Megan said and It struck a nerve. Casue she said the mormon thing was just a phase... And I know that the actual religion isn't, but it's kinda now like you treated then doctrine of the church like it... Liek it only applied if you didn't have a bf.
Cat Catharsis (12:28:57 PM):	I know. And I feel badly about it. Marc Jas and I have been talking about it cuz we're ALL having a falling out of sorts right now.
YouStutterOften (12:29:44 PM):	Ahhh. Good <3>
Cat Catharsis (12:31:43 PM):	mmm. yeah. see. i don't know what to do about that too. cuz I've told Mike I want to slow down, and he would do anything for me, we both know that... but I don't know. its hard once you've gone fast. i know you don't really understand... but I'm trying to find a way to put this all back together. and going away for six months in January will either make Mike and I stronger or tear us apart. And me going off to BYUI will either make me stonger of a Mormon, or it will tear me apart. I think BYUI is going to be the majorrrr deal breaker for me.
Cat Catharsis (12:32:09 PM):	*by you dont understand I mean, you've never had an accelerated relationship
YouStutterOften (12:32:34 PM):	Lol, I knew what you mean. I knew it wasn't the mean kind of "You suck at understanding, shut up."
Cat Catharsis (12:32:48 PM):	LOL. I just wanted to clarify
Cat Catharsis (12:32:50 PM):	:P
YouStutterOften (12:32:54 PM):	lol, kk
YouStutterOften (12:33:08 PM):	What made you do stuff in the first place? lol
YouStutterOften (12:33:16 PM):	Just cause it was available and made ya feel good?
Cat Catharsis (12:33:25 PM):	no. because I wanted to.
YouStutterOften (12:33:28 PM):	[I don't wanna get into details, lol, i was just curious]
Cat Catharsis (12:33:34 PM):	lol
Cat Catharsis (12:37:00 PM):	idk. sometimes you have to fall to figure things out. I don't even KNOW if this is falling, [tho, i know MANY people think it is falling] and maybe this IS a mistake, but I don't know yet. I know that I will LEARN whether or not it is a mistake. Thats what I want most of all. I want to learn. I can't learn from stories. I can try, but stories are only fake emotion. I want real emotion to learn from. Nothing faux. Sometimes people don't need to learn from mistakes, but I think I'm the type of person who does, and so far, I don't feel as though I'm making a mistake. Its all just moving forward in life. I don't regret anything, and even if Mormonism doesn't work for me, which I know it will in the long run, I won't regret a minute of it. I don't regret my baptism by fire, I don't regret moving so fast into the religion. I made a choice, and I live with it. I made a choice with Mike, and I will live with it. I won't hole myself up with my mistakes like some people do or just plow thru my mistakes like they never happened and abuse life like some people do. my name is martin luther king and I just made a semi impressive speech last second. let freedom ring.
YouStutterOften (12:38:02 PM):	LMFAO
YouStutterOften (12:38:04 PM):	<3
Cat Catharsis (12:38:07 PM):	=]
YouStutterOften (12:38:09 PM):	I get what you're saying.
Cat Catharsis (12:38:25 PM):	glad to hear that. i wasn't even sure what I was saying. LOL
Cat Catharsis (12:38:27 PM):	jk.
YouStutterOften (12:38:52 PM):	So, what have you learned so far from this 'situation'? or what ever you wanna call it... lmao. I could tell =P jkkkk
Cat Catharsis (12:39:16 PM):	which 'situation'? me being a bad mormon?
YouStutterOften (12:39:25 PM):	Yeah, I guess, lol
Cat Catharsis (12:41:15 PM):	Hmm. I've learned that I am human and prone to making mistakes, even when I try not to. I've learned that when I am ready I can repent, however, I will not deny the Holy Ghost. If the Holy Ghost kicks me in the buttox I'll do what I feel prompted to do, but I feel like I'm not doing anything wrong. Not yet. And I'm not going to pull a Tom and stop going to church. Not ever. Marc Jas and I discussed how we may suck at following doctrine, but we won't ever stop believing. Marco said that at some point he may become inactive, but he won't ever deny his faith.
YouStutterOften (12:42:33 PM):	Okay. Good. That's basically what I was hoping to hear. Ok. I'm not annoyed or worried or anything anymore, haha.
YouStutterOften (12:42:40 PM):	<3
Cat Catharsis (12:43:16 PM):	LOL. Good. No, don't worry. I'm not going to do what some thought I would do. But HEY, I lasted longer than Christmas! I'm not a Buddist yet!
YouStutterOften (12:43:36 PM):	LMMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
YouStutterOften (12:43:39 PM):	<33333333333333
Cat Catharsis (12:45:00 PM):	do you think tom will ever come back to church?
YouStutterOften (12:45:06 PM):	Nope.
Cat Catharsis (12:45:23 PM):	do you think he regrets it all?
YouStutterOften (12:45:28 PM):	Well, when he comes to pull his papaers, I think he might attend the service.
Cat Catharsis (12:45:41 PM):	he IS pulling his papers?
YouStutterOften (12:45:49 PM):	No. I don't think he regrets the church. I think he regrets rushing.
YouStutterOften (12:45:52 PM):	Unlike you =P
YouStutterOften (12:45:57 PM):	Yep.
Cat Catharsis (12:45:58 PM):	haha.
Cat Catharsis (12:46:48 PM):	ugh. i wish he hadn't felt like he needed to keep up with me. i wish he just learned at his own pace. i had 3/4 of the religion covered already from past religious studies. he had........... 1/16th.
Cat Catharsis (12:47:41 PM):	and I feel bad about accusing him of basing our friendship off a lie. the only reason he joined at a fast rate was for friendship.. the only reason I was really friends with him was out of respect that he could take religion so seriously, then we became friends thru church activities and such. now, he is such a different person.
YouStutterOften (12:48:09 PM):	Mmm, but you are, too.
YouStutterOften (12:48:18 PM):	I think that if you hadn't changed so much, WE wouldn't even be so close.
Cat Catharsis (12:48:28 PM):	I know. its weird.
YouStutterOften (12:48:53 PM):	Mmm. But we're growing up... It's kinda really nice, lol

YouStutterOften (12:28:50 AM):	But in his position, you're hypocritical.
Cat Catharsis (12:29:07 AM):	WE'RE BOTH HYPOCRITICAL.
Cat Catharsis (12:29:20 AM):	he can't accuse me of being hypocritical; that's hypocritical!
Cat Catharsis (12:29:24 AM):	ITS A FERKIN CATCH 22
YouStutterOften (12:29:49 AM):	The fact that you see it makes it not matter anymore. He just needs to notice that either way, you're both like that, and he needs to get over it.
Cat Catharsis (12:31:02 AM):	yup. i acknowledged it. I mean. I guess I couldnt really say anything in the first place: i've never been in a relationship. I didn't understand the emotion and passion behind finding someone you like a lot. that doesn't count as an excuse though. I just didn't realize it.
YouStutterOften (12:31:51 AM):	Exactly, lesson learned, time to move on.... But he doesn't get it.
Cat Catharsis (12:32:40 AM):	ugh. why does HE have to be the slow learner :P just kidding. I know we'll get past this. I asked him if he wanted to pull his records, honestly, because its so final, so definite. He said he didn't know. he wants to talk to bishop first.
Cat Catharsis (12:32:46 AM):	idk how that's going to end, honestly.
Cat Catharsis (12:32:53 AM):	hes never OPEN with bishop.
Cat Catharsis (12:32:55 AM):	EVERRR
YouStutterOften (12:33:24 AM):	I don't think he's really open with any one the way that he should be. =[

Change. This is all about change. We've both changed. A lot! You say you miss me? I've been missing you since New Years Eve. That is when I feel as though I lost you.

"My fingertips are holdin' onto the cracks in our foundation,
And I know that I should let go, but I can't."

Sometimes I feel bad for Mike, because I do love you so much. And sometimes I feel bad for Megan, because I know that you love me so much. It feels like I'm not giving Mike everything he deserves. I know you don't like Mike and feel as though he doesn't deserve me, but I feel as though I don't deserve him. Maybe things won't work out. I don't predict the future, but I promise you, he has treated me as best as I would wish to be treated. And as far as me doing better? I don't see that at all. I have no idea how I can do better. I've never had a guy turn his head twice for me. Mike does constantly. He gives me more than the time of day.

This hurts. You think it doesn't for me? Its been hurting. Its been a four month long hurt. It hurt a lot the first few weeks of 2008, but you know me. I let it scar and I look at that scar constantly, metaphorically speaking. I remember how much it hurt when I got that scar and the remembrance makes it hurt again. This scar? It wasn't just a little flesh wound. It wasn't a scratch that bled for a minute then scabbed over. This was a deep wound. It took more than a month for the bleeding to stop. But the scar is made. We both made it. I know that recently it has been my turn to make the wound. I didn't think my pursuit of happiness would affect you so badly. I know your own pursuit of happiness affected me negatively, but I didn't think you'd be so.. so.. ME about this. Maybe that proves how alike we truly are.

You know what pushed me away? Honestly? Well, there are a few factors, some of which I'll publicly display. The way you kept pushing yourself between Mike and I for starters. I really do love the fact that you're trying to protect me, like a brother would, but it seemed like more, like you were jealous. Jealous to a different degree. It kind of frightened me.

Having you say that you accept the relationship means so much to me. It really does.


I know Mike won't like this Blog. He hates the fact that another guy means so much to me. He hates when I talk about him. He hates when I complain about him. He hates when I tell stories involving him. He will hate this blog.

I hate how you're both so jealous. I hate how she hates me in your life. I hate how he hates you in my life. And I hate this emotion.

A meaningful message.

A Message by George Carlin:

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken ho mes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete...

Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.

Remember, to say, 'I love you' to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.

Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

Words are the means to meaning

Every word in life is for your personal interpretation. Thats why words are so dangerous. Words express your point of view, but you must be certain that your point of view is expressed clearly and concisely or else your point of view is turned into someone else's point of view. When your view is turned to someone else's view, your view is obliterated; it is now someone else's view, but they can accuse you of their view of your view. Follow me? Probably not. I'm not expressing my view very well.

Its like the Bible. EVERYONE sees the Bible differently. No one person sees the Bible in the same light. Its personal interpretation. Mayhap God wants us to see Him as we will, because He is all.

Making sense now?

Every word has hundreds of meanings, especially when paired with several other words. Phrases all have different weights, different emotions, and different meanings to every person. When I say that I miss someone, maybe I mean to say "I miss your company" or "I miss who you were" or even "I miss who I used to be around you" or any other amount of things. Only you can really know what you mean until you use thousands of words to get your point across to someone else.

Words are sacred.

skip.a.beat.

For you, my heart beats in 3/4 time,




when its written in 4/4 time.

overwhelminggggg

Wild Olive. <3



El libro de Mormon.

"Don't forget to be true to yourself in hopes of doing what everyone else wants."
-Thomas James-

BK=love

It took about four times to spell "love" correctly. :P

Mozz. sticks - $0.00
Icee- $0.00
Mashed potatoes with who knows what added to it- $0.00

Hearts on wrappers,
numbers with mozz sticks "*wink*"
Tom's crazy concoctions comprising of said potatoes and strawberry cola,
snow ball fights with BK employees,
employees using trays to slide down the play-place slide,
calling John gay, the guy who gave me his number,
hugs that crack your back
and heart-felt apologies.
priceless.

A topic with an excuse of posting pictures.

The most beautiful flower ever is
[in my opinion]
the sunflower.
Even its name brings cheer.

it is just, perfection.

I just imagine me sitting in a garden filled with just,
sunflowers
and I immediately feel better.

;;&&;;

&&;;

You know how pictures can speak a thousand words?
These don't speak enough.

Sometimes it hurts.
It hurts to be your best friend.
Some days I completely can't stand you, then I get home and say to myself,
"gosh, I love that kid."

You never express yourself.
I take wild stabs in the dark to try to figure out what is making you so.. so..
RIDICULOUS.
We're all entitled to our ridiculous days.
Don't abuse your right.
I try to talk to you and you either brush it off with a dreaded:
"whatever",
or you just act like nothing is bothering you.
Best friends means:
no judgement
no second guessing
no hesitation
support
[even when support is futile]
comfort
trust
inside jokes
laughter
memories
no stipulations
hugging unabashedly
talking freely
not being ashamed
and so many other things.

I remember when our friendship was so pure
so raw.
When we spent hours online talking into the early hours
about nothing at all.
We were the living proof that two people could have nothing in common
except their friendship
and still get along perfectly.
But now?
I don't feel trusted.
I feel like I'm just another person to you.
I understand I'm not your top priority person.
That's fine.
I just don't want to be last.

This isn't just about today.
[which was still disrespectful],
its been building up inside of me for a while.
I knew you were going through some stressful situations,
so I didn't press the envelope.
I thought maybe when you were done stressing things would fall back in place.
[Which is why I tried to rush the falling pack in place thing]
[[but its to my understanding that didn't help at all from your POV]].

This phrase we use all the time is getting old.
I'm tired of using it,
as are others...
but:
I miss you...
And I know another who does too.

PS if this is Austin, I still love you.

PPS: funny quote I found that is relative to the subject:

"Friendship is the marriage of the soul, and this marriage is liable to divorce."

-Voltaire-

9/11: a composition by Cat

I thought I was alone.
I thought I was the only one who always caught the clock
at that terrible time.
Have you ever looked up at the clock
only to see that time on your clock
and it would send a chill down your spine?

For my English class we were told to write a journal entry about a tragic event. He suggested a few and I used 9/11. Here be it:

“A building is a symbol, as is the act of destroying it. Symbols are given power by people. A symbol, in and of itself is powerless, but with enough people behind it, blowing up a building can change the world.” (V for Vendetta, 2005)

September 11, 2001

Today was surreal. I saw the footage, I heard the screams. I heard the fall, but I couldn’t feel anything. I didn’t feel the pain. I couldn’t smell the charred air. I couldn’t sense the panic, but I saw it. I could only see the panic, horror and despair in newscasters’ eyes, and I could hear the stress in their high-pitched voices. It takes a significant event to truly make a newscaster nervous. I can only imagine. They have had the duty of reporting many tragic stories, but this? I can’t imagine. The images must still go through their heads late at night when they let their guard down, safe within their warm beds.

I’m telling only what I remember and what emotion I have obtained since the occurrence. I was eleven then, seventeen now. I remember sitting in Mrs. Tarbox’s room studying Egyptology. The next thing I remember is seeing her looking down at the class very seriously. She informed us that something historic and tragic was happening and in short told us that a plane had collided with one of the twin towers in New York City. Perhaps she mentioned the Pentagon, or the stray plane that missed its mark, but that I don’t remember. I just remember hearing “New York City”.

We gathered in the science room, the largest room available to house the entire sixth grade. The teachers, and I presume the administration, felt it was important we see the footage of our nation’s history in action. The live footage was, and still is, worse than any rated ‘R’ movie ever created, because movies are just that: created. This was real. At first I was in shock. I thought it was a prank, a joke, a hoax. April fools. No one could really fly a plane, a huge plane, into a building, filled with people. Things like that just don’t happen. Not ever. I couldn’t wrap my eleven year old mind around it. It didn’t make sense to me then.

Over and over again and again, they showed the plane colliding into the skyscraper. Suddenly I heard the newscaster, a woman as I recall, gasp loudly then exclaim, “Dear God!” In that moment that tower became the first tower. On live TV I watched a second plane hit the second world trade center tower. It became so real so suddenly. I wanted to blink. I wanted to cry. I wanted to scream. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t move, speak or think. I’m not even sure I breathed. I was in such a state of shock. “It’s real, it’s real. It’s really real” was all that went through my head along with “I’m never going on an airplane”. Yes, it finally hit me. You can see things in your every day life, but not acknowledge them. It happens quite frequently, but I came to a realization: America had been attacked; America was being attacked; an attack was made on America.

For hours, days, weeks, the footage poured into every television in America, and I’m assured any other television in the world. My family and I watched the telly late into the night knowing we now lived in a changed world. We weren’t the only ones with this cold realization in mind.

Over the years 9/11 has become more and more real. I think of the countless people who tried to preserve human life and humanity that day. To the firefighters who boldly ran in when the masses poured out. To the entire community of firefighters who form the tight-knit bond of brotherhood. To the police forces who tried to keep the general public safe, organized and calm in that terrible time of crisis. To those who had no chance of surviving this tragic event. To those who ran. It’s real. It always was.

As an eleven year old, I tried to imagine myself there on that dreadful day. I imagine I feel the weight of the air and smell the horrid smell of fire that consumed all in its sight. I could feel the panic in the air laced with dread, fear and devastation. I watched as human life poured out of the building, soot and dust smeared all over these professional looking men and women. They scream and they run. They run as far as they can. Everyone around me is running. Running from the scene I can not pull myself away from. There is so much yelling and pandemonium. I hear people screaming names at the building hoping, praying that the person who belongs to that name will come stumbling out of the crumbling building. Those who do escape cry out for those who did not. My adolescent mind wonders how these people could look so terrified, so dirty, so crazed. They look like they barely escaped a war zone.

Only minutes later did I notice that the entire building was being ravished by flames. My imagination portrays my idea of how the scene looked like intertwined with fact. Fact was, it was raining. Many wished it was raining actual drops of water. No. It was not that glorious liquid from the sky. Bodies fell from the heavens. In my mind, I thought they lost their balance. Now I understand that they threw themselves out of the building. I still don’t understand completely. By throwing themselves from the high altitude they were at, did they expect to live, or was death by plummet preferred to death by fire, explosion, suffocation or being crushed? Did they not understand the hazard they made by throwing themselves out windows? I know for a fact several people died from being pelted by a victim. Maybe it was a survival instinct. Maybe I will never know. All I know is that bodies fell from the sky and in my immature mind, made the most sickening “splat” sound I could have ever imagined. I never want to hear that sound anywhere else besides in my imagination. Even then, I don’t believe it is a sound you can fully imagine but I am sure it is a sound you can not forget if it is ever heard.

I imagine the distress of the next day, September 12^th, 2001. The family, friends and general mourners gathered with flowers, pictures and questions. Many questions. I imagine papers fluttering in the breeze, dust and ash from the previous day’s travesties. In my mind I see print outs of loved one’s faces with big bold font asking if anyone has seen that person. In my imagination, I can’t see the physical ground zero. I can imagine the forces there attempting a search and rescue and the shouts of joy when someone is found in the rubble.

This isn’t anything I like to imagine or think about often. It isn’t anything discussed in detail with anyone. It’s almost like a private thought or emotion that almost everyone in America shares and just knowing that is comfort enough. There is no need to bring it up every time you think about it. It’s tucked back into the dark depths of your mind where cobwebs grow over that memory. It’s a subject discussed in schools, or in passing, yes, the facts are discussed briefly, but it proves difficult to identify with the emotions experienced on that day. Where were you when America was attacked?

Hate;

I actually have a subject for this one.
This thought was inspired by church today when we discussed hate. One person said that they don't hate, they just hate with a passion. Is that not the same concept? Passion is defined by www.dictionary.com as "any powerful or compelling emotion or feeling, as love or hate." It says it right in there; "hate". So by saying that you "dislike with a passion" its a double form of hate. Its like saying exactly "I dislike you in a powerful, compelling emotion or feeling of hate."

Wow. Huh?

So, the resolve? Don't waste time disliking or hating when you can spend your time wisely by liking and loving. It takes so little energy to like someone, or to love someone. Occasionally, you will come across people who are hard to like, but you just have to look past their faults. Everyone has faults, obviously its just, some people's faults are more on the surface than others. You just have to accept that and move on.

March 14th

I have this theory I have been thinking about a lot lately. I discussed it with Becca and she feels the same way. I [we] believe that there isn't just one perfect someone in the entire world made just for you, but in fact there are several. I believe you can fall in love with anyone at all, if you choose to, mutually. You have to make it work and want to make it work. Of course that little spark is needed, but I'm relatively sure more than one person makes your heart stutter. I could definitely go more in depth, but I don't really feel like it.


Yesterday, Becca and I went to see 10,000 B.C. It is about an hour and forty minutes long, entirely non-fiction, but very good. If you like symbolism and half naked men in loincloths, its a perfect movie for you. I give it a 6/10. It conveyed a cute love story and a good story-line of heroism, but lacked clarity. Many times I had to ask Becca what was going on and half the time she couldn't tell. The filming style [or lack thereof] was something to be desired and some facts were not very factual, [they walk out of a snowy mountainous area and are all of a sudden in a hot tropical forest...] It is entertaining, but don't go if you're looking for something realistic. Wait till it hits DVD and rent it.


Ahh haha. I loveeee Degrassi. <3

Marzo 11, 2008

I'm not even going to bother with an intro to this new blog of mine. It won't be my last first post. I can guarantee that.

I got my new email for BYUI. Its gla08002@byui.edu
I'm pretty hyped on the idea of me going to college.. I just am not as hyped about leaving the people here. Some, yes, I can't WAIT to leave behind, however, some people I just want to put in my suitcase and take with me. Tom for instance. We finally got to hang out today for the first time in a few months. I wicked miss that guy. He is my other half. Its like we were born to be best friends. =] I don't ever want to lose that. EVERRR.

There are so many people I don't want to leave behind. If I began listing, I'd be here all night making sure I didn't miss someone. =/

So, today, Tom and I, as I said, got to hang out. First we went to Sally's to get me a better straightening iron. That was fifty dollars gone in under a few minutes. Then we got Quiznos. Freakin' delishhhhhh. Haha. He got some chicken-bacon sandwich and I got Tuscan Turkey. We both thought the opposite sandwich was appeasing, so we traded half of our sandwiches for the other. Next on the agenda we went to the Mall. Someone [Tommmm] didn't have toll money, or an EZ pass... so, Sally [his GPS that I named Sally] told us out to get there without going through the tolls. So, we went through Maine to get to Newington. I officially love shopping with Tom. At first he was like, mellow in the background while I tried to find a shirt, but then he helped me figure out what shirt I wanted to buy at American Eagle, my new obsession. Then, he insisted upon carrying my bag. Long ago, in like, July, we planned on going to the Mall, but our plans were canceled. Back in July he told me he would carry all my bags like a real gentleman should, and he remembered how he told me that LAST JULY and obliged. I thought I was the only psycho person out there who remembered little trivial things that people say. I have a memory for the oddest of things, but never my work, or due dates... selective memory.

Needless to say, I had a great night, and I know he did too. <3