Don't blog when tired and frustrated.
Of course everything is fine. My teacher was very understanding.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Why this week? [[huge rant]]
I'm so bloody frustrated. It's like, all this semester it's a cakewalk and midterms come and it's not hard at all, but then, this last week and a half, it's like, OH by the way, this assignment is going to be a lot more in depth than the last one that was just like it, or, OH we're going to make it so that you can't access the internet where ALL OF YOUR ASSIGNMENTS ARE for 2 days. Did we say 2? We meant 5. So now teachers feeling the heat of the deadline say, OH it isn't your fault that the internet was down, we totally understand. So can you do the assignments that you had to do last week by 10pm tonight? Yes all of them, don't be silly. Your other teacher wants you to do the same? Well, great minds think alike! By the way, your group presentation tomorrow needs to be 15 minutes long.
I kind of wish I had a longer semester.
I go to school where the semester is only 12 weeks long.
It feels like 12 days.
Most schools are 16 weeks long.
What is 4 weeks?
Here is what 4 weeks are.
Take your 4 extra weeks and shove them somewhere back into 12 weeks. Blend well!
I have to do the same amount of work that any other college student does, I just have less time to do it. My 2 credit classes are more demanding than my 3 credit classes. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE TO YOU?
Allegedly, a 2 credit class demands 4 hours of homework a week. However, I usually end up doing 8 hours of homework for 2 of my 2credit classes.
If I get a poor grade, I'm just going to take it again.
Yeah, it's a waste of time, but hey, I'm going to be staying year round here and doing 3 semesters and a block period. That is a lot of time. That is kind of a lot of money... but I will have to figure it out... or just get married.
There isn't anything I really want to do.
I don't want to study anything in particular.
I don't want any particular kind of job.
I want to read good books, raise good children and have an amazing husband whom I would love and I want him to have a good job. Is that a huge problem? I hate grades because if I don't do well, then wow, I feel so stupid, but the thing is, is that I know I'm not. I just suck at HUGE LENGTHY assignments that take up HOURS of my time. I am average when it comes to tests, but the more questions you stick on a test, the worse I'm going to do.
I feel like I'm not designed for your typical school system.
I don't learn when I have hours of homework.
I don't learn by reading 100 pages of literary analysis notes.
I learn when I try to do those things but then go to class and you talk about them.
I can't just read some huge in depth reading and then analyze what an insect symbolized when it stung a sinner in Dante's version of Hell. Maybe YOU can, but I can't.
Sad thing is, I'm only taking 13 credits.
I hope as I get more into my major things even out a little bit.
[English education and theatre minor]
I like reading.
I like writing.
I don't like being told what to read and how to analyze it.
I don't like being told "WRITE EXACTLY THIS"
This I promise though:
This last week is going to kill my grades because of stress, classes that shouldn't exist and WON'T exist after this week, excessive readings, lengthy papers and huge presentations along with numerous group meetings and too many tests. But I also promise this: I can't let it happen next time. . . and I need my ultimate motivator to help me. I miss you Becca. ='[
Sometimes friends, true friends, tell you what you don't want to hear
but it is exactly what you need to hear.
I kind of wish I had a longer semester.
I go to school where the semester is only 12 weeks long.
It feels like 12 days.
Most schools are 16 weeks long.
What is 4 weeks?
Here is what 4 weeks are.
Take your 4 extra weeks and shove them somewhere back into 12 weeks. Blend well!
I have to do the same amount of work that any other college student does, I just have less time to do it. My 2 credit classes are more demanding than my 3 credit classes. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE TO YOU?
Allegedly, a 2 credit class demands 4 hours of homework a week. However, I usually end up doing 8 hours of homework for 2 of my 2credit classes.
If I get a poor grade, I'm just going to take it again.
Yeah, it's a waste of time, but hey, I'm going to be staying year round here and doing 3 semesters and a block period. That is a lot of time. That is kind of a lot of money... but I will have to figure it out... or just get married.
There isn't anything I really want to do.
I don't want to study anything in particular.
I don't want any particular kind of job.
I want to read good books, raise good children and have an amazing husband whom I would love and I want him to have a good job. Is that a huge problem? I hate grades because if I don't do well, then wow, I feel so stupid, but the thing is, is that I know I'm not. I just suck at HUGE LENGTHY assignments that take up HOURS of my time. I am average when it comes to tests, but the more questions you stick on a test, the worse I'm going to do.
I feel like I'm not designed for your typical school system.
I don't learn when I have hours of homework.
I don't learn by reading 100 pages of literary analysis notes.
I learn when I try to do those things but then go to class and you talk about them.
I can't just read some huge in depth reading and then analyze what an insect symbolized when it stung a sinner in Dante's version of Hell. Maybe YOU can, but I can't.
Sad thing is, I'm only taking 13 credits.
I hope as I get more into my major things even out a little bit.
[English education and theatre minor]
I like reading.
I like writing.
I don't like being told what to read and how to analyze it.
I don't like being told "WRITE EXACTLY THIS"
This I promise though:
This last week is going to kill my grades because of stress, classes that shouldn't exist and WON'T exist after this week, excessive readings, lengthy papers and huge presentations along with numerous group meetings and too many tests. But I also promise this: I can't let it happen next time. . . and I need my ultimate motivator to help me. I miss you Becca. ='[
Sometimes friends, true friends, tell you what you don't want to hear
but it is exactly what you need to hear.
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Memories
I know you tried
I know you're cursed
I know your best was still your worst
When Hollywood was calling out your name:
Saint Augustine.
[Band of Horses]
Summer of '06
I know you're cursed
I know your best was still your worst
When Hollywood was calling out your name:
Saint Augustine.
[Band of Horses]
Summer of '06
Friday, July 3, 2009
This is the gray liberal side of me.
I had a friend ask me about gender and gender roles and so we had this conversation and though none of you know him, I deleted his name. We shall call him "A" haha. Enjoy my insights and his insights on "gender" vs "sex." =]
BTW, he's pretty cute and a non-conformist Mormon. C'est amour! ;]
3:07 AM me: Gender, eh?
A: lol yeah :) it's my thing :)
me: Haha. What do you consider gender to be? What defines a man and what defines a woman?
3:08 AM A: u asking me? I asked first :) hehe
me: Haha. well, I just wanted to know where you stand on the concept.
3:10 AM A: i'd like to hear your thoughts before i explain mine. let's just say i have a problem with what they teach in psychology books.
me: HAHA. I bet.
A: but i really like to hear what other people think
i see truth and insight from other's ideas
me: Okay. So, I believe that at birth we are defined as with a sex, male or female, but in our lives we develop into a GENDER. Very different from someone's sex.
3:11 AM Some of us define our gender as our sex
some of us feel as though we identify more with another sex/gender.
in foreign countries there are up to 5 genders.
some alter their bodies to coincide with teh gender they identify with.
3:12 AM i myself don't completely identify as a female
it's kinda odd
yah, but it's true.
A: not odd to me
me: My ex girlfriend doesn't care what pronoun you associate with her.
I once introduced her as my boyfriend
A: :)
me: and she was not offended even though she had the junk of a female.
3:13 AM then i have many gay boy friends who will one day dress like a rugged guy and the next will go out with shaved legs and a skirt.
I believe gender is where you find full comfort in yourself.
I've just developed a strange liking of pink as a stereotypical girl would.
haha.
A: ha :D
3:14 AM it's not a bad color
me: . . . what GENDER are you? :P
just kiddingggg
A: hahaha
me: but yah, that is it in a nutshell.
A: that's cool :) thanks for sharing! I really love non-conformists, lol
me: hahahaha.
3:16 AM A: i've watched a lot of documentaries on transgendered identified individuals, and I've always been real interested in the social construct of gender.
do you want to know what i think?
3:17 AM me: of course. =] I love non-conformists. ;]
A: haha
3:20 AM well, I think that biologically male males and biologically female females are determined thusly. what I find interesting is those who feel incomplete in their sex/gender because of the social ideals that define what is male and what is female. Personality traits and gender roles for instance, I believe, have nothing to do with a persons sex. And that a boy shaving his legs and wearing a dress is completely masculine. Really... who is to say it is unmanly to do so?
3:21 AM I see harm in defining gender, because it will cause an identity crisis in those who feel they don't fit the confines of definition set my society
me: UM CHYEAH.
lol
A: lol
3:23 AM so, I could go on forever, lol. but that' basically it. I think that whatever traits a male has are masculine traits... and that maybe traits and personality shouldn't be defined by gender... though this has been the case throughout history and across cultures... as you mentioned
and same for females... that a biological female is completely feminine... because of that.
but it doesn't mean you have to fit the molds set by society
3:24 AM me: ugh. society does suck. haha. but I agree. femininity should have nothing to do with the little black dress and elegant hair.
A: right?
3:25 AM me: and masculinity shouldn't have to do with how many hours a day a guy is at the gym..
3:27 AM A: i always felt inferior/incomplete because i didn't fit the mold. I think this is why I relate to those with so called gender identity disorder... seriously, how do these five year olds believe they are the opposite gender just because of their likes and dislikes? because it is being beat into their brains that boys do this... and girls do that...
if those parameters weren't there... and if ones gender wasn't defined by personality and roles, than they wouldn't have to feel they are incomplete in any way
3:28 AM me: precisely. I like the way you think. :] I utterly hate black and white, and gender has a million miles of gray.
3:29 AM A: :D because people are a million shades of grey! there's no use trying to define us and set us into little boxes, because the cool (us) ones will refuse.
lol
me: LOL. legit. so true.
3:30 AM I have an article saved on my computer about the fifth gender if you're interested in it... i did a research paper on homosexuals last semester. hahaha
A: awesome! i'd love to read it! I did a research paper of gender roles last year, too. lol
3:31 AM me: o this is definitely up yer alley then. haha. I actually have the link.
http://insideindonesia.org/content/view/484/29/
indonesia is where all the gender roles are hoppin.
3:32 AM A: haha apparently
me: myes.
3:33 AM A: there's a group of men in tonga that are raised as girls.... usually if a family has only boys the mother will take one of the younger ones and raise them as women to do all the household chores and stuff.. interesting huh?
they're called fakaleke's
3:35 AM me: That is really something. It isn't degrading or anything either, it's just like assigned roles for the home. I dunno. It's different. I mean, think about if it had been reversed. anything feminine were masculine. say the guy was the home-maker and teh woman had to provide for the family. it's just a definition.
A: precisely
3:36 AM http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=30327010&op=1&o=global&view=global&subj=1326150033&id=1326150033#/photo.php?pid=30078102&op=1&o=global&view=global&subj=1326150033&id=1484757486 .... are you TRYING to reinforce gender stereotypes?!?! LOL
3:37 AM me: I was forced into it at a birthday party. any other day you'd see me with a freeze pop stained shirt, a shovel, my boy-hair cut and my tonka truck. :P
you just caught me on an off day. haha
A: hahaha :) i love it.
3:38 AM me: My daddy told me that I would make a great flapper. hahaha
A: Well, Cat... I knew I liked you for a reason... haha. :) Thanks for the insights and conversation! I worked for 11 hours today, so I should get some sleep, lol.
3:39 AM hahah you would!
me: HAHA. I would have been dead asleep by now were I in your predicament. Well, get some good rest young suh. And I'm sure that we will talk again sometime in teh future. =] gnite.
A: hehe for sure.. night :D
BTW, he's pretty cute and a non-conformist Mormon. C'est amour! ;]
3:07 AM me: Gender, eh?
A: lol yeah :) it's my thing :)
me: Haha. What do you consider gender to be? What defines a man and what defines a woman?
3:08 AM A: u asking me? I asked first :) hehe
me: Haha. well, I just wanted to know where you stand on the concept.
3:10 AM A: i'd like to hear your thoughts before i explain mine. let's just say i have a problem with what they teach in psychology books.
me: HAHA. I bet.
A: but i really like to hear what other people think
i see truth and insight from other's ideas
me: Okay. So, I believe that at birth we are defined as with a sex, male or female, but in our lives we develop into a GENDER. Very different from someone's sex.
3:11 AM Some of us define our gender as our sex
some of us feel as though we identify more with another sex/gender.
in foreign countries there are up to 5 genders.
some alter their bodies to coincide with teh gender they identify with.
3:12 AM i myself don't completely identify as a female
it's kinda odd
yah, but it's true.
A: not odd to me
me: My ex girlfriend doesn't care what pronoun you associate with her.
I once introduced her as my boyfriend
A: :)
me: and she was not offended even though she had the junk of a female.
3:13 AM then i have many gay boy friends who will one day dress like a rugged guy and the next will go out with shaved legs and a skirt.
I believe gender is where you find full comfort in yourself.
I've just developed a strange liking of pink as a stereotypical girl would.
haha.
A: ha :D
3:14 AM it's not a bad color
me: . . . what GENDER are you? :P
just kiddingggg
A: hahaha
me: but yah, that is it in a nutshell.
A: that's cool :) thanks for sharing! I really love non-conformists, lol
me: hahahaha.
3:16 AM A: i've watched a lot of documentaries on transgendered identified individuals, and I've always been real interested in the social construct of gender.
do you want to know what i think?
3:17 AM me: of course. =] I love non-conformists. ;]
A: haha
3:20 AM well, I think that biologically male males and biologically female females are determined thusly. what I find interesting is those who feel incomplete in their sex/gender because of the social ideals that define what is male and what is female. Personality traits and gender roles for instance, I believe, have nothing to do with a persons sex. And that a boy shaving his legs and wearing a dress is completely masculine. Really... who is to say it is unmanly to do so?
3:21 AM I see harm in defining gender, because it will cause an identity crisis in those who feel they don't fit the confines of definition set my society
me: UM CHYEAH.
lol
A: lol
3:23 AM so, I could go on forever, lol. but that' basically it. I think that whatever traits a male has are masculine traits... and that maybe traits and personality shouldn't be defined by gender... though this has been the case throughout history and across cultures... as you mentioned
and same for females... that a biological female is completely feminine... because of that.
but it doesn't mean you have to fit the molds set by society
3:24 AM me: ugh. society does suck. haha. but I agree. femininity should have nothing to do with the little black dress and elegant hair.
A: right?
3:25 AM me: and masculinity shouldn't have to do with how many hours a day a guy is at the gym..
3:27 AM A: i always felt inferior/incomplete because i didn't fit the mold. I think this is why I relate to those with so called gender identity disorder... seriously, how do these five year olds believe they are the opposite gender just because of their likes and dislikes? because it is being beat into their brains that boys do this... and girls do that...
if those parameters weren't there... and if ones gender wasn't defined by personality and roles, than they wouldn't have to feel they are incomplete in any way
3:28 AM me: precisely. I like the way you think. :] I utterly hate black and white, and gender has a million miles of gray.
3:29 AM A: :D because people are a million shades of grey! there's no use trying to define us and set us into little boxes, because the cool (us) ones will refuse.
lol
me: LOL. legit. so true.
3:30 AM I have an article saved on my computer about the fifth gender if you're interested in it... i did a research paper on homosexuals last semester. hahaha
A: awesome! i'd love to read it! I did a research paper of gender roles last year, too. lol
3:31 AM me: o this is definitely up yer alley then. haha. I actually have the link.
http://insideindonesia.org/content/view/484/29/
indonesia is where all the gender roles are hoppin.
3:32 AM A: haha apparently
me: myes.
3:33 AM A: there's a group of men in tonga that are raised as girls.... usually if a family has only boys the mother will take one of the younger ones and raise them as women to do all the household chores and stuff.. interesting huh?
they're called fakaleke's
3:35 AM me: That is really something. It isn't degrading or anything either, it's just like assigned roles for the home. I dunno. It's different. I mean, think about if it had been reversed. anything feminine were masculine. say the guy was the home-maker and teh woman had to provide for the family. it's just a definition.
A: precisely
3:36 AM http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=30327010&op=1&o=global&view=global&subj=1326150033&id=1326150033#/photo.php?pid=30078102&op=1&o=global&view=global&subj=1326150033&id=1484757486 .... are you TRYING to reinforce gender stereotypes?!?! LOL
3:37 AM me: I was forced into it at a birthday party. any other day you'd see me with a freeze pop stained shirt, a shovel, my boy-hair cut and my tonka truck. :P
you just caught me on an off day. haha
A: hahaha :) i love it.
3:38 AM me: My daddy told me that I would make a great flapper. hahaha
A: Well, Cat... I knew I liked you for a reason... haha. :) Thanks for the insights and conversation! I worked for 11 hours today, so I should get some sleep, lol.
3:39 AM hahah you would!
me: HAHA. I would have been dead asleep by now were I in your predicament. Well, get some good rest young suh. And I'm sure that we will talk again sometime in teh future. =] gnite.
A: hehe for sure.. night :D
Monday, June 29, 2009
Sometimes I wonder
Sometimes I wonder, what is the use in being responsible and mature if no one else wants to board that train?
I'm not saying I'm the most responsible and mature person out there, obviously, but I do get quite annoyed when people decide that they don't need to even try to be responsible or mature.
If you say you're going to do something, DO IT.
If you know you're about to be in an environment where money is going to be highly mandatory, get a job.
Don't mooch. That is such a pet peeve all of a sudden.
I see mooching everywhere.
I did that in high-school.
Bahh.
Sometimes I feel like if I'm not directly involved in the lives of others, my friends, I don't really know what is going on with them. Like, long distance? It is so easy to lie and pretend everything is okay when it isn't.
I miss home, yes, but some days I really just want to settle out here and leave old ties behind. I'm beginning to notice how some of my old ties feel like obligations instead of actual wants. I dunno. I doubt I could just leave New England behind. I don't want to be just another Mormon living in Mormon Central. Ya digg?
I keep having dreams about marriage. I don't know if the Lord is trying to hint at something, but these dreams haven't been like others. [lolz@BexWhoKnowsWhatI'mTalkingAbout] In old dreams about marriage, everything felt uncomfortable. I was in some huge dress with a ton of people staring at me and it was all stiff and formal and foreboding. "Till death do you part." And it was the same with the faceless man at the altar with me. It felt like .. uncomfortable.. again. Like it wasn't right. But lately, I've been having these dreams where I have been in a smaller, lighter room in a dress that was modest and not completely uncomfortable. There would be a small gathering of people, but not many at all. And the man? He and I were so unified in everything. We were like one. It didn't feel comfortable, necessarily, because at first marriage is like trying to make two units one. However, it was uplifting, beautiful, and I felt at peace with it. And now I feel, more than ever, that I want to find that feeling. I feel like I could be with a guy for eternity and love every minute of it. I want that.
I'm not saying I'm the most responsible and mature person out there, obviously, but I do get quite annoyed when people decide that they don't need to even try to be responsible or mature.
If you say you're going to do something, DO IT.
If you know you're about to be in an environment where money is going to be highly mandatory, get a job.
Don't mooch. That is such a pet peeve all of a sudden.
I see mooching everywhere.
I did that in high-school.
Bahh.
Sometimes I feel like if I'm not directly involved in the lives of others, my friends, I don't really know what is going on with them. Like, long distance? It is so easy to lie and pretend everything is okay when it isn't.
I miss home, yes, but some days I really just want to settle out here and leave old ties behind. I'm beginning to notice how some of my old ties feel like obligations instead of actual wants. I dunno. I doubt I could just leave New England behind. I don't want to be just another Mormon living in Mormon Central. Ya digg?
I keep having dreams about marriage. I don't know if the Lord is trying to hint at something, but these dreams haven't been like others. [lolz@BexWhoKnowsWhatI'mTalkingAbout] In old dreams about marriage, everything felt uncomfortable. I was in some huge dress with a ton of people staring at me and it was all stiff and formal and foreboding. "Till death do you part." And it was the same with the faceless man at the altar with me. It felt like .. uncomfortable.. again. Like it wasn't right. But lately, I've been having these dreams where I have been in a smaller, lighter room in a dress that was modest and not completely uncomfortable. There would be a small gathering of people, but not many at all. And the man? He and I were so unified in everything. We were like one. It didn't feel comfortable, necessarily, because at first marriage is like trying to make two units one. However, it was uplifting, beautiful, and I felt at peace with it. And now I feel, more than ever, that I want to find that feeling. I feel like I could be with a guy for eternity and love every minute of it. I want that.
Sunday, June 28, 2009
one five two
One Hundred Fifty Two
If I had not joined the church, I would not know 152 people. . .
And that is just on Facebook.
Yeah, I counted. I'm not tired and I'm bored.
Hehe.
<3
If I had not joined the church, I would not know 152 people. . .
And that is just on Facebook.
Yeah, I counted. I'm not tired and I'm bored.
Hehe.
<3
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Monday, June 22, 2009
And someone tell me
WHY CAN'T I COMMENT ON ANYONE'S BLOGS? I've been trying so hard.
I'mma go cry myself to sleep now.
I'mma go cry myself to sleep now.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Tall, blonde and athletic
Why does this guy go for the same girl time after time?
Why do so many go for this kind of girl?
I wish I were born in the age of Rome when women were portrayed as not stick thin, round faces, brown eyes and brown hair and BEAUTIFUL.
Gosh, those were the days.
Why does he have to be so amazing and so "higher than thou?"
Why does he have to just bring a smile to my face?
Why do I have this feeling like I need to like any girl he considers dating to see if she is good enough for him?
Why does he describe the perfect girl as tall, blonde and athletic?
When was perfection based on looks?
Sure, after that he adds in the whole, "and wicked spiritually righteous."
BUT STILL.
This isn't about me saying that I wish I were with him, just, I wish his standards weren't so saturated with how a girl looks. I mean, maybe he does.. but the thing is that most bothers me is that she MUST be athletic.
Ms. Bingley, sister to Mr. Bingley, friend to Mr. Darcy described how perfect a woman must be in all the fine arts and anything less was mediocre. Sometimes in this culture, I feel the same way.
I don't dance ballroom or western.
I don't sew.
I don't go to the temple weekly. [But would like to start on that goal.]
I don't know anything about kids.
I don't ... know.
[/rant]
Why do so many go for this kind of girl?
I wish I were born in the age of Rome when women were portrayed as not stick thin, round faces, brown eyes and brown hair and BEAUTIFUL.
Gosh, those were the days.
Why does he have to be so amazing and so "higher than thou?"
Why does he have to just bring a smile to my face?
Why do I have this feeling like I need to like any girl he considers dating to see if she is good enough for him?
Why does he describe the perfect girl as tall, blonde and athletic?
When was perfection based on looks?
Sure, after that he adds in the whole, "and wicked spiritually righteous."
BUT STILL.
This isn't about me saying that I wish I were with him, just, I wish his standards weren't so saturated with how a girl looks. I mean, maybe he does.. but the thing is that most bothers me is that she MUST be athletic.
Ms. Bingley, sister to Mr. Bingley, friend to Mr. Darcy described how perfect a woman must be in all the fine arts and anything less was mediocre. Sometimes in this culture, I feel the same way.
I don't dance ballroom or western.
I don't sew.
I don't go to the temple weekly. [But would like to start on that goal.]
I don't know anything about kids.
I don't ... know.
[/rant]
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
I love
my friends.
honesty.
non-prideful-ness.
my friends.
being a non-normal Mormon. [oxymoron, eh?]
being drama free.
having an answer because of religion.
wearing a Warped Tour hoodie, an Underoath shirt, black skirt and black leggings.
forgiveness.
moving on.
using more mature language than constant swearing.
proper grammar.
my iPod.
memories.
knowing what good came from today's 2yr mark.
my roommates.
pretending my English homework doesn't exist.
no-bake cookies.
eating Spanish food and Italian food in one sitting.
babysitting.
sleeping.
asking questions.
that in thirty eight days I get to see my family.
having goals.
being a young adult.
my friends.
A Day to Remember.
Alesana.
Skylit Drive.
Parkway Drive.
Chiodos. :P
Techno.
Music en general.
Wal Mart.
germ-x. Hahahahaha.
being excruciatingly early.
spell-check.
coupons.
Pasta-Roni.
reading.
juice.
sunlight.
rain.
thunder.
hail.
emails.
people who have the same struggles that I have.
a far-see. HAHA.
Nathan Samuel.
printing presses.
wi-fi.
black ink pens.
big purses.
sleeping.
skirts... with leggings. Haha.
not conforming to the professional style.
not knowing what I want to do with my life.
kids.
literate people.
language to be precise. (Then I think you mean "precise language.")
quoting movies that most people don't know about.
Ellen Page.
when people squirm during pg-13 movies.
making lists.
ending blogs.
honesty.
non-prideful-ness.
my friends.
being a non-normal Mormon. [oxymoron, eh?]
being drama free.
having an answer because of religion.
wearing a Warped Tour hoodie, an Underoath shirt, black skirt and black leggings.
forgiveness.
moving on.
using more mature language than constant swearing.
proper grammar.
my iPod.
memories.
knowing what good came from today's 2yr mark.
my roommates.
pretending my English homework doesn't exist.
no-bake cookies.
eating Spanish food and Italian food in one sitting.
babysitting.
sleeping.
asking questions.
that in thirty eight days I get to see my family.
having goals.
being a young adult.
my friends.
A Day to Remember.
Alesana.
Skylit Drive.
Parkway Drive.
Chiodos. :P
Techno.
Music en general.
Wal Mart.
germ-x. Hahahahaha.
being excruciatingly early.
spell-check.
coupons.
Pasta-Roni.
reading.
juice.
sunlight.
rain.
thunder.
hail.
emails.
people who have the same struggles that I have.
a far-see. HAHA.
Nathan Samuel.
printing presses.
wi-fi.
black ink pens.
big purses.
sleeping.
skirts... with leggings. Haha.
not conforming to the professional style.
not knowing what I want to do with my life.
kids.
literate people.
language to be precise. (Then I think you mean "precise language.")
quoting movies that most people don't know about.
Ellen Page.
when people squirm during pg-13 movies.
making lists.
ending blogs.
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Why is it?
People think I'm prideful and judgmental just because I'm Mormon.
I state that someone was basically walking around naked because her skirt BARELY covered her butt, and I get the response, "it's because she isn't Mormon."
NO. For the love of all that is sane, it's not that. IT'S BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T RESPECT HERSELF. It has NOTHING to do with religion.
UGH.
I state that someone was basically walking around naked because her skirt BARELY covered her butt, and I get the response, "it's because she isn't Mormon."
NO. For the love of all that is sane, it's not that. IT'S BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T RESPECT HERSELF. It has NOTHING to do with religion.
UGH.
Friday, June 12, 2009
I knowwww
I know I can't be there tomorrow like I said I would A YEAR AGO, but plans change in 365 days. I can't control some elements.
I love you. You know that. I'm here for you. You know that.
Don't distance yourself.
You're talking to me now. Thank you. But don't pretend like I don't care.
I care.
I love you. Forever. No matter what our differences become.
I love you. You know that. I'm here for you. You know that.
Don't distance yourself.
You're talking to me now. Thank you. But don't pretend like I don't care.
I care.
I love you. Forever. No matter what our differences become.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Srsly Hobbits?
I miss my shire. Haha.
I love being drama free. Forrealz.
There is NONE of this silly "He said, She said" nonsense.
I'm going to clean my apartment. Peace!
I love being drama free. Forrealz.
There is NONE of this silly "He said, She said" nonsense.
I'm going to clean my apartment. Peace!
Monday, June 8, 2009
Hi
I'm alive.
I just have nothing to talk about.
But for a good time:
I love this and have watched it many times.
Another good time:
Bahahaha!
Favorite logo by far.
I just have nothing to talk about.
But for a good time:
I love this and have watched it many times.
Another good time:
Bahahaha!
Favorite logo by far.
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Next chapter
I'm tired of being the one to try and reach out.
I'm entering a new chapter of my life: the last year of my teenage years.
You know how I'm going to celebrate?
...
I'm going to decorate my jeans with permanent marker.
I might color my hair a drastic color... [Dark dark brown or blonde?]
I'm going to buy a new pair of jeans, [the presentable kind.]
I'm going to be eating cake for about a week straight.
I might paint my nails.
I will eat nothing but brussel sprouts for an entire day.
I will drink so much kool-ade I will be saying "OHHHHH Yeaaahhhh" without meaning to.
I will decorate every paper I need to hand in on Friday with cupcakes and candles with big print that says, "I'M NINETEEN TODAY!"
I'm going to prepare my papers like every good Mormon boy. [total jk]
I will sleep in. . . [I do that anyway]
I will re-read the only really good teen-fiction book I have, Just Listen.
I will do my homework. UGH.
Oh, and one last thing,
I will know who my friends are.
I still love the kid, but he has changed so much, and he is not the person I knew when I left home.
[Meggie, please take no offense to this; it has nothing to do with you. I think you're amazing and a good friend. =D ]
He knows what to say to hurt me, just like Andrew knew what to say. He knows exactly what subtle little things will push my buttons, and he will push them.
Maybe I have changed. After all, "people don't change, we change." --> Andy Warhol
But I still feel like he is the one who has changed.
Tom: I[we] weaseled our way out of an english term paper
I'm entering a new chapter of my life: the last year of my teenage years.
You know how I'm going to celebrate?
...
I'm going to decorate my jeans with permanent marker.
I might color my hair a drastic color... [Dark dark brown or blonde?]
I'm going to buy a new pair of jeans, [the presentable kind.]
I'm going to be eating cake for about a week straight.
I might paint my nails.
I will eat nothing but brussel sprouts for an entire day.
I will drink so much kool-ade I will be saying "OHHHHH Yeaaahhhh" without meaning to.
I will decorate every paper I need to hand in on Friday with cupcakes and candles with big print that says, "I'M NINETEEN TODAY!"
I'm going to prepare my papers like every good Mormon boy. [total jk]
I will sleep in. . . [I do that anyway]
I will re-read the only really good teen-fiction book I have, Just Listen.
I will do my homework. UGH.
Oh, and one last thing,
I will know who my friends are.
I still love the kid, but he has changed so much, and he is not the person I knew when I left home.
[Meggie, please take no offense to this; it has nothing to do with you. I think you're amazing and a good friend. =D ]
He knows what to say to hurt me, just like Andrew knew what to say. He knows exactly what subtle little things will push my buttons, and he will push them.
Maybe I have changed. After all, "people don't change, we change." --> Andy Warhol
But I still feel like he is the one who has changed.
Tom: I[we] weaseled our way out of an english term paper
5:12 PM me: WHATTT? How did you get out of the like, 589372583 page torture?
Tom: It wasn't that hard.
I ended up doing a book report. That was like 3 pages typed.
On a god bashing book.
It was epic.
5:13 PM And i got a hundred.
woot.
me: Who is your English teach?
Tom: capello
5:14 PM me: Dang, well, that's cool.
Tom: Yep.
5:15 PM me: I"m pretty glad I had so much experience writing wicked long papers, cause now it is so freakin' easy to just do a six page paper.
Tom: Yeah.
5:16 PM I don't need to do papers that are gay though. I can do a paper on chemical structure of neopropylene like nothing.
5:17 PM something like analyze the protagonist of whatever is dumb.
me: Tom... just because you have your opinion, and you know it, doesn't mean you need to demean other people and what they enjoy doing.
5:19 PM Tom: I was just saying.
5:20 PM me: You were just saying in a very negative and vengeful way. I don't want to analyze your words but I do want you to know that what you say highly affects other people. It is very easy to say something that will feel like a personal attack to others.
5:21 PM Tom: Yeah, well.
Whatever.
HE THEN SIGNED OFFLINE,
HE THEN SIGNED OFFLINE,
5:23 PM me: That was very immature. I didn't expect such conduct from someone who used to have such a high demeanor. You have changed a lot, and I don't appreciate your negative attitude. I hope graduation goes well for you and that you are able to succeed in your college career.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)