Your blood was strewn across your walls

Writing on the walls. (You should have killed me when you had the chance.)

So, today, I started to hum a song that I haven't sung in a while, so I tried to remember the lyrics. It took a while, but I did. When I sang this as a seventh grader, I didn't understand it; in fact, I thought it was stupid because, I didn't think that love was like this. But now, I completely understand.

The water is wide, I cannot get o'er.
And neither have I wings to fly.
Give me a boat that will carry two,
And both shall row, my love and I.

I leaned my back back up against an oak
I thought it was a trusty tree
but first it swayed and then it broke
So did my love prove false to me.

Oh love is handsome and love is blind
And love's a jewel when it is new
but love grows old and waxes cold
and fades away like morning dew.

I thought that that was so morbid. Love is like a fairy tale. Once you find it, you never lose it. It never goes away, or so I thought. (That's why I will never be like one of those girls out here who meets and marries within 2 months.)


Addictions are bad... unless it is cathartic addictions to music. My cathartic addiction right now? A Day To Remember, Stick to Your Guns and a little bit of UnderOath... but mostly A Day To Remember.


ADTR:
Cause I try, So hard to make this right.
You've got my back on the wall.

After all you've put me through,
My friends still stay true.

Your reign is over,
Why couldn't you prove me wrong?!


I tried to be a hero.
I was afraid it would still be needed.
Why??!
I feel like a failure. I should have been there.
YOU SHOULD HAVE REACHED OUT.
I'm not Jesus and I'm not your hero.
And I don't need anyone on this Earth to save me.


Forward. Forward. FORWARD.
posi!
I refuse to believe that there is nothing out there.
I will improve.
I will be a better person.
I will gain a stronger testimony.
I will do my work. (Do work!!)
I will love again.